I am trying a new thing — to live as I would like, here in Sacramento. To live as if I am not constrained — not by Zing or by grief or by fear.
- What would I do if I didn’t worry about Zing?
- What would I do if I didn’t feel sad, missing Clark, but rather felt elated by his confidence in me (which he repeated like a love song) and his satisfaction with life?
- What would I do if I weren’t afraid I’d screw up new challenges (finances, hardware… ) that face me these days?
I aim to find out. As Clark would say, "It's just another part of the adventure."
This morning I took Zing to Grateful Dog, then tackled business details. I don't like this. Even though it's everyday stuff, it really scares me. So I am starting where I believe knowledge begins -- with the words. I am going to gradually assimilate the vocabulary: Asset, liability, etc. ... simple terms that you probably say with ease, and one day I will say them easily too.
In the early evening Zing and I took a long walk across the gold Tower Bridge. When we got to the far side, a bicyclist was pedaling toward us; at the the bridge she looked down and gasped. A few steps ahead, we could see what had startled her: a woman was crouched on the path, spreading out a tarp and a tent, claiming a spot for the night on the bridge. Tower Bridge: bicycle path ... walking trail ... bedroom. At that point Zing and I turned around. Once on the city side I glanced at the sky, and the full moon took my breath away. A little later we passed through the park by Crocker Art Museum, where a high school band was marching, practicing under the trees. I love city life.
Love,
k
No comments:
Post a Comment