Jan 28, 2017

If a tree could walk ...

Written last night:

Dear Friends,

It’s a turning point in my relationship with Zing — I am fashioning a life of my own and going places without my dog! This takes some planning, because he’s not completely out of his Separation Anxiety, but we’re both calmer these days. So, using the resources I’ve developed, I will be stretching the time I leave Zing at home alone. (Of course, right now that’s about two minutes…) Today I gave him the anti-anxiety pills that quiet him for several hours, and then walked three blocks to the Crocker Museum to have lunch with my new friend Faith. Before I left the apartment I turned on my iPhone video to record any whimper Zing might make. Lunch with Faith was so inspiring that I forgot to worry he might be barking. Faith is a beautiful woman who almost always wears a cape. Today it covered a black striped menswear suit that she said she’d bought in Italy. She’s 91 years old and a cheerleader to me. We met when our dogs crossed paths in the park. When I got back home I discovered the audio somehow didn’t work, so I don’t know if Zing barked or not. Let’s just say he didn’t. 

I’ve been thinking about those three words that I’ll carry around in my head for three months: not New Year’s resolutions, but guides. I’ve decided to eliminate Beauty for now — even though beauty is in the back of my mind all day, and I’m convinced we each define our own beauty. I’m sure it will be a future Word for me. But now my words are Spirit, Breathe and Tree. 

Spirit reminds me that I want to ask people about their spiritual life. Sometimes I feel confused and I want to know what has meaning for others.

As for Breathe — Patrick has been encouraging me to slow down and breathe. I want to count to five breathing in and six breathing out each time I pass through a door. Of course, I haven’t done that even one time yet! 

And the Tree notion came to me from walking on these tree-lined streets. For most of my life I’ve been thinking I should stand up straighter, walk  more confidently, and lately — do something tight with my core. Those admonitions never work, and as I get older I think I slouch even more and lead with my head sticking out front, like a chicken maybe. So I decided to stand like a tree and walk like a tree might if it could. Trees are all shapes. They stick out this way and that with a lovely grace. I’m going to try to walk less like a model and more like a tree.

Love,
k

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